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How to Date Like You're Not for Everyone

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

Boiled down: you're not for everyone, just like everyone is not for you!

Yet, many people date trying to attract everyone in hopes they'll match with more people. So they hide unique hobbies, try to say the right thing, and act like someone far from themselves on dates.

But there are two problems with that dating method:

  1. Your potential matches aren't seeing the real you from the get-go.

  2. You're not dating from a place where you believe in your self-worth.

If your goal in dating is to find someone who loves you for you, why would you try to hide parts of yourself?

Say you love painting mini action figures (real story-- I dated a guy who did this). If you're worried that people will find that embarrassing and automatically swipe left on you, then you're putting yourself in a position of matching with a lot of people who will see your hobby as embarrassing.

Which, if it's your passion, is going to really suck not having a supportive partner.

Meanwhile, if painting action figures is something you want your future partner to not only tolerate but admire about you, then why on earth wouldn't you put it in your dating profile or talk about it on a first date??

Also, by hiding your hobby like it's something shameful, you're not seeing your worth exactly as you are. You subconsciously tell yourself that you must be smaller to fit into other people's lives.

And that's not how we date around here!

So the next time you feel like you need to hide something "embarrassing" or think your dating profile won't be attractive to enough people, I want you to take a step back.

You're not for everyone, and that's okay. You're better off dating like you're only a great match with a few people and focusing your energy on them.


Check out my free dating anxiety journal prompts to help you understand yourself more and the changes you want. to make in dating.

If you want to move towards feeling confident and secure when looking for love, grab your copy of my 30-day dating guide "From Anxious to Secure."

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